Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

And the sadness?

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

It’s still here.

I took a video of my serve (60 FPS) and it took 0.4 seconds from my racket to the service line. How fast would you say my serve was?

The sadness was still there.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

I had run out of hope.

Did you know God exists? 900+ answers later and no atheist has yet to be successful. Day 8 of asking Atheists to provide a SINGLE argument that demonstrates a cause for the beginning of the universe while avoiding the problem of infinite regression.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

Are there legal obligations to report the known whereabouts of a missing person that doesn’t want to be found?

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

It’s here now, writing to you.

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In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

Be who you already are.

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

Why are you bare-nakedly displaying your anti-Trump bias while ignoring the liberals' destruction of the US? I am now blocking your e-mails because of your biased articles.

I was tired of fighting.

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

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Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

Why do people keep complaining about how some people copy and paste the question before answering it? To me, it's very disturbing and makes me want to block and mute them as annoying whiners.

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

I was tired of trying and failing.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

Can it be true that people know your name, not your story, they’ve heard what you’ve done, but not what you’ve been through, so take their opinions of you with a grain of salt?

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

☆ what's the thing that made u fell in love with your bias?

You are like me, then.

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.